The runway maybe closing soon. Sometimes you just have to stop walking.
A year ago I started sharing my thoughts publicly. Entry after entry, I enjoyed making a chronicle of what it’s like to be me. Even if plenty of what I’ve written bordered on rage, hurt, and sadness, putting it “out there” somewhat gave me satisfaction — the kind of satisfaction I used to get from smoking a few years back when I was still in the habit (prior to having my teeth corrected with braces).
I may not have an idea if I’m read at all (or probably it’s just me checking my own site every so often that’s why I have such modest hits), but it felt nice blog after blog — from the moment my fingers hit the keys of my Apple up to when I edit my entry many times over. Even if I was writing something unpleasant, I felt good after writing.
For any writer, nothing beats the feeling of seeing your thoughts take form. That’s what I felt. My new form of release was healthy than smoking. No comparison there, actually.
The wonders of WordPress furthered my interest in keeping my online space. Actually, I got more into it with the incessant prodding of my friend who maintains his own blog for years now. Going to his site and reading his entries pushed me to make my own. He’s so good that once you read his blog, you want to make one of your own. Well, at least for me, that did it. He’s Moleksine while I’m Merit.
However, right now, I don’t find myself in what Randy Jackson of American Idol loves to say “in the zone” anymore. Funny that I’m writing this entry to say I may end my blog. It’s not that I’ve gone bored, but I feel I don’t belong out there anymore. I’m guessing no one would care if I put -30- here anytime soon.
Probably, I just need a break or a one-way ticket.
